despedidas

So here I am, at the end of my study abroad experience, and I have some very cliche mixed emotions about it. They are cliche for a reason!! It's hard to leave a country that has been so great to me. I love living in a new culture, learning new things every day, exploring, speaking more and more Spanish, etc. At the same time, I miss almost everything about my life back in the States and am beyond excited to return to that. Sometimes all I want to do is sleep until Sunday when I get on a plane back to the US. (Of course, that might also just be because I'm really tired. Going to goodbye parties every night last week wears a girl out.)

So how do I balance the excitement of adventure and knowledge of exploring the world with the familiarity and undying love I have for my life stateside? I guess the answer is to travel often. But one thing I loved about studying abroad and (mostly) staying in one place for four months was the slow process of becoming fully integrated into Valdivian life and Chilean culture. Of course, I'm not fully integrated after four months, but I was starting to feel like Valdivia was my home. I am a pro at public transit, the Chilean slang is rolling off of my tongue with ease, my favorite karaoke bar knows my name... I would love to live in another country long enough to fully become a part of another culture. Which I guess is why anthropology fascinates me. But will I ever be willing to part with my awesome life in the US for long enough to create a whole new life for myself somewhere else?

LUCKILY I am still young (living my last days as a 20-year old, as a matter of fact!) and I am sure that in my life I'll have plenty of time to travel & live abroad and also live in my home country. One of the things I got from this experience that I didn't expect is that now I have so much appreciation for US culture. There are still a lot of things I dislike about it, but being away has reminded me of all the things I love about it. (Of course, that might be Chilean culture rubbing off on me... they are very patriotic here.) One thing I love about the US is that since it's so large, with so many states and regions, there's a lot of diversity- of people, of ideas, of FOOD (Indian food get back into my life!!), of clothing styles. Not to say that Chilean culture is completely monotonous, but the US definitely has it beat on diversity.

Basically, as much as I have fallen in love with Chilean culture, I have also re-fallen in love with US culture. We'll see if that infatuation lasts once I'm back or if it's an "absence makes the heart grow fonder" type of situation.

But ramblings about cultural differences aside, the hardest part about preparing to leave has been saying goodbye. Last week was an emotional rollercoaster- I oscillated between pure joy that I got to experience Chile with so many amazing people and pure heartbreak that most of these people will cease to be in my day-to-day life. I'm still kind of oscillating, but now that I've said most of my goodbyes (triiiiste) I'm feeling more leveled. And excited because my birthday is in two days!!

And my adventuring isn't even over yet! The two days before my departure will be spend in the capital city, Santiago, in a hostel that has a pool. My only impressions of Santiago so far have been of the airport and the bus terminal, so I'm excited to see what else the city has to offer me. Fact about Chile: HALF of the population of the entire country lives in Santiago- somewhere around 8 million people! So if you don't hear from me before I'm back in the states, it's because I'm becoming a city person for the weekend and also probably slightly an emotional wreck. But of course, no one wants good experiences to end, and I love that I've been here and I love what I'm going back to. So chao for now, see you in the States!